Looking for answers

[Jayne Cobb]

Jayne made his way to the passenger dorms. He checked Shepherd Book's room first. It felt eerie to be there, since no one had been in it since he had left. A cursory glance told Jayne that River was not in here, and hadn't been in here for awhile.

He shut the door and moved to the next one, which happened to be her room. The door was open slightly and he could see a dark shape huddled on the bed.

"River?" he asked as he opened the door another inch. "Can I come in? Wanna talk to you, girl."

[River Tam]

Access not permitted. *She gruffed, turning over on her bed, burying her head deeper into her pillows. She had one leg stretched out on the bed, while one curled closer to her body. The edge of her dress rode up, barely covering her theighs at all.*

[Jayne Cobb]

Jayne rolled his eyes and came in anyway, shutting the door behind him.

"What's goin' on, River?" he asked, trying not to stare too much at her exposed legs. "Heard you laid out your brother. Not that I ain't exceedin'ly proud o'ya, but still. What'd he do to deserve that?"

[River Tam]

I'm sick. I need a Doctor. That's what Simon thinks. Sick simply because I know truth *She mumbled, shifting a little to sit up, scooping the pillow into her lap, clutching it close.

Her stare was like ice* Why you care?

[Jayne Cobb]

He nodded, coming over to sit on the edge of the bed. "Thinks he knows what's best, I guess. Always has t'be Mr. Right."

Jayne blinked at her words. "Why do I care? I should think it would be obvious, girl. Especially after what happened t'day. Why would I not care?"

[River Tam]

Simon knows nothing. He should accept that...should accept and remain quiet. He was no help when he was needed, now he tries to force help. *She shifted, scooting away from him, her hands moving to yank down her dress slightly*

You just want to experiment. 'Speriment with many girls...many times. No interest till I was the only option *She grumbled*

Where did the girl go?

[Jayne Cobb]

"Part o' that's true and part of it ain't," he said, averting his gaze. "But you was never the only option." He paled at that. "Uh, what I mean is that you ain't like the other girls I been with. You're different. Special. Took me a while to actually see you for what you was."

He grimaced when she mentioned Michelle. "She's in the kitchen with Kaylee an' yer brother. With some o' her friends."

[River Tam]

Oh yes. Different...special. What you mean is crazy, dangerous. Broken! *She jumped up from the bed, her arms moving to wrap around her frame, looking to the floor, not wanting to look at him*

She can't be no more then a year younger then me...*She whispered in almost a disgusted tone*

[Jayne Cobb]

"That ain't what I mean at all!" he exclaimed, his eyes following her as she got up and walked to the door. "You're whole! You're real! You ain't fake like those other women I was ever with."

"Why are you so upset I di'n' tell ya 'bout her? I di'n' tell anyone. Di'n' think it was important. No one seems t' be bangin' down my door askin' me personal questions, so I figured what was the point?"

[River Tam]

I do ask! *She whipped around* I ask, I've always asked! *She looked so hurt...so pained as she glared at him. The ice was melting away, and what was left was the real issue.

A little girl who was just starting to learn about love was hurt.

She kept her arms around her frame, hugging herself* I ask about home...never, never did you mention this. Family is home and she is family and you never, never said! *Her voice was growing, and she didn't care in the slightest*

[Jayne Cobb]

Jayne didn't stop looking at her. He couldn't. She looked so hurt and betrayed, just one more thing in her life to hurt her.

"I can't say anythin' t' make it better, River. I know I hurt ya with this, but..." he trailed off and looked away at that point, unsure of what to say.

"This is a part o' myself that I keep buried. Way down deep inside me. I never let anyone in there. It's true you was the one person who seemed t' care while you was askin' me about home and you was and is the one person out of everyone else I shoulda told." He met her gaze again, a look of sadness on his face. "An' I'm sorry 'bout that. 'Cause I was hopin' t' actually try and make things work with you an' me. Guess I screwed that up but good now, huh?"

[River Tam]

*She heard his words and her face fell more. Her eyes were glistened over and she was literally blinking back tears.

Was she pushing him away? Had she ruined this? Simply because she was angry...and upset? Was it over before it had even had a chance to begin.

She said nothing, just standing there, a few feet away, her body shaking as her lip trembled*

[Jayne Cobb]

Jayne saw the emotions play across River's face as he spoke. He stood up from his spot on her bed and pulled her into his arms, hugging her to him. He ran a hand through her hair, trying to be comforting, but feeling like he was failing.

He hadn't made a woman cry since Eva.

[River Tam]

*Her arms unraveled from her, moving to wrap around him, resting on his back. She buried her face in his chest, breathing in his scent. It was intoxicating...made her dizzy in all sorts of wicked and wonderful ways. She shut her eyes, trembling still*

She's going to hate me...*She whispered agaisnt his coat*

[Jayne Cobb]

Jayne shook his head and kissed the top of her hair. "I don' think so. How could anyone hate ya?"

"I guess jus' give it time. I'm still gettin' used t' the fact that she's actually here."